Start accepting yourself, living your values, and being joyful in the present moment.

“Refining our Black Girl Magic”

Therapy for Young Women of Color

Society is changing all around us, and sometimes we don’t have the words to really guide our young women through the problems they are facing.

You may be witnessing your daughter go through any of the following:

• Staying in their room for too long
• Struggling to come to terms with who they really are
• Visibly preoccupied with relationships that are unhealthy
• Crying alone
• Dealing with drastic changes in their mood
• Becoming a follower to her peers
• Taking on the problems of the world at such a young age
• Not getting the same grades that they used to
• Losing motivation in school, or for the things that made them happy
• Worrying too much
• Having trouble dealing with loss
• Harming herself or engaging in risky behaviors
• Thinking or talking about death
• Not smiling the same way they used to
• Scared of everything, especially after the pandemic and social distancing
• Always angry or aggressive with the people around them
• Insistent on talking about things that make you feel uncomfortable (E.g., sex, gender, race, world events)

“Finding your Inner Queen”

Therapy for Women

As women we are expected to do it ALL sometimes – sustain friendships, get good feedback at school/work, gain acceptance from our communities as a woman, and maintain questionable standards of beauty. It is easy to lose your power. You deserve to be heard!

Some women struggle with the following:

• Difficulties finding their own interests and identity due to societal, family, or others’ expectations
• Not feeling “good enough”
• “People pleasing”
• Trying to be perfect all the damn time
• Creating high demands on yourself daily. (Over packing your schedule).
• Not feeling “good enough”
• Unexplained feelings of shame or guilt
• Not having the words to articulate the losses or traumas that have lived through
• Having to comply with religious, cultural or career practices that magnify our ideas of feeling “lesser than”
• Feeling stuck
• Like there is a limit to how successful you can be
• Isolating from others, especially other women
• Navigating your life around constant looming threats of violence or being assaulted
• Only focusing on seeking the validation of others, and not your own
• Being made to feel like you can’t express yourself or that your feelings don’t matter
• Constantly judging yourself and other people
• Troubles saying “No” to, or creating a healthy distance from, family or friends
• Staying in relationships where we are made to feel “less than”
• Feeling like you always have to prove your Womanhood

“Aligning with Your Inner King”

Therapy for Men

Society has spent many years expecting you to “man up” or hide your feelings. They taught you to never cry, to keep your feelings “in check” and to “act like a man”. You have also had to grit your teeth through racism and violence on your own.

However this has robbed you from the ability to live genuinely. You may be facing the following:

• Difficulties connecting with partners, children, others
• Feeling like an island or a “lone wolf”
• Moments of sadness and hopelessness
• Pressure to perform for others – your job, your family, society
• Anger. So much anger you can’t take it
• Falling into relationships that feel manipulative or insincere
• Fixation on video games, drugs, sex or gambling
• Having to meet unreal expectations and stereotypes
• Trouble getting past losses or terrible things you have been through
• Lacking motivation to do the things you want or have to do
• Inner tension or conflict
• Feeling like you shouldn’t be, or aren’t worthy of being, alive
• Troubles keeping a clear mind or controlling your emotions

A man who has committed himself to maintaining inner strength can be a force of nature in his home, career and communities.

“Breaking the Cycle”

Therapy for Generational Trauma

There is much beauty in the blood that runs through your veins – rich ancestry and heritage unlike anything anyone can understand without having lived in your shoes. Whether your family (like mine) made the brave trip to the United States, or you descended from African Americans and Native family members that have struggled to adapt to a country that was not made for them, the privilege of residing in this country has always come with the emotional consequences passed down from the generations before you.

If you feel any of the following, you’re in the right place:

• If you feel like a character from Disney’s “Encanto” – Luisa (The Strong One), Bruno (The Black Sheep), Isabela (The Golden Child) or Maribel (The Isolated One)
• An anger that you can’t pinpoint.
• You have a very unkind inner voice in your head that sounds a lot like your parent/grandparent or someone from your past.
• Like you are not worthy of the things you want.
• Sometimes it’s easy to self-sabotage opportunities or relationships.
• Having to always hide your accent, or parts of who you are, to feel safe in certain spaces.
• Troubles with self-esteem or identity.
• Heavy discomfort with expressing yourself to your loved ones.
• Always being hypervigilant around people and places.
• A guilty conscience when you take care of yourself.
• Difficulties trusting institutions, like law enforcement or mental health.
• Immediately resorting to spanking or hard punishments on your children.
• Feeling too ashamed to speak up for yourself.
• Flashbacks or always reliving moments of your childhood.
• Shamed for creating healthy distances from family or friends.
• Believing that you have to be perfect all the damn time.
• Struggling to break out of old family roles, traditions and expectations.
• Difficulties trusting people.
• Feeling like you always attract people that don’t make you feel the way you deserve.
• Overwhelmed because the way your parents treated you is not how you want to treat your own children.
• Never really feeling like you truly fit in anywhere.

In a society that wasn’t created for you it is up to you to retake your emotions and create a new legacy for you and your future generation.  

As a Dominican-American second generation immigrant, I decided that the constant anxiety that I felt within my family system (The pressure to be perfect and “act accordingly”) was not going to be my children’s responsibility.